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I’m taking a break from the simplicity series.  I’ve been thinking about it and realized I’ve been avoiding blogging because of it.  Which would obviously be the opposite of the point of doing a series.  There is just so much content to sift through in my brain that when I would have a chance to sit down with my thoughts, it would be the last thing I wanted to do.

Then.  Just this morning our pastor talked about a false simplicity – one that turns complex things into simple, check-lists to do.  I have such legalistic tendencies in my heart – both prideful, self-righteous ones and prideful, insecure ones.  I really want to avoid both and felt like I was teetering the line a bit lately.

So a break.  It’ll be nice.  When the urge to blog about the fam or a God lesson or a story from work hits, I’ll not feel the need to write a thesis first before I share.

So about the fam.  Caden and Dan are at the first of two birthday parties today.  I am tagging in for the second one.  So until they get back for the 30 minutes in between parties, and while the baby (toddler) sleeps, I have a quiet house.

Speaking of house…we are set to close on buying one in 6 days!  What?  I know, fast.  We’re 6 months ahead of our schedule to start getting serious about buying.  But one we had our eye on went down another big amount and so we put our offer on the table.  And 3 weeks later here we are!

There are lots of little details I’ll refrain from publicly blabbing about that have fallen into place in this whole situation.  And I’m not freaking out, which is from God.

But I do have to admit, I am so bi-polar about it all.  I’m excited about lots in the new place.  Namely, we’ll have room to move around.  But, man, am I gonna miss our neighbors.  Or as my group leader would say, “with new life there’s always death.”  Or, more accurately, as Jesus would say.  And that’s all I have to say about that.

In other news, we had our first parent-teacher conference a couple weeks ago and it went great!  Caden is improving so much in everything from sitting still to tracing letters.  We’ve seen big improvements in his ability to focus on one thing at a time, too.  Such a big kid.  I’m so proud of him.

Caleb is a big kid, too.  He’s getting like 6 teeth at once and is still an easy-going little man.  I’ve really been enjoying time alone with him in the afternoons.

God continues to teach me things in our prayer study.  Last week focused on God’s authority right after a Sunday sermon on authority.  I love when God does that.  It makes me know I need to pay attention.

I love our friends.  Our community has been such a blessing to us lately for lots of different reasons.  Sometimes I get this idea in my head about what a community “should” look like.  Then in the middle of my idealistic frustration, someone in my reality-of-a-community will bless my socks off and I’ll be mayor of humble-ville.  I really like that place.  I need to keep my hiney in it.

We are loving learning with others in the training program at our church.  A new quote that’s had me pondering is, “All true acts of leadership are acts of suffering.”  We talked about a posture and behavior of selflessness, how our leadership needs to be for others.  But the biggest leadership temptation is self-promotion.  Our pastor said the best way to combat it is by surrounding yourself with people who really speak the truth to you.  And if you have a marriage partner that isn’t overly impressed with you, that’s a good thing.  I must say, Dan’s good for me in that way.  He’s never bought any of my bull.  I’m the better for it.

And that concludes this brain dump.  Hope you’re having a good Sunday!

“The possibility for this collective work of individuals transforming the world is rooted in the nature of how we exercise influence on creation around us.  Dallas Willard, in The Divine Conspiracy, makes clear that each of us has a ‘kingdom’ or ‘queendom,’ its boundaries determined by the range of our effective will, where what we want done is done….

God has endowed each of us with a ‘realm’ where our will is done, for good or ill.  This is the mental and physical space where what we do and say has a significant bearing on the outcome of events.  If our queendom functions well and is characterized by virtue, those it affects will be encouraged toward right function and true virtue.  If our kingdom is dysfunctional and characterized by vice, those it touches will be encouraged toward dysfunction and vice…

Though we may wish for the peace and security of a safe harbor where vital decisions do not need to be made, God will not infringe upon the range of our effective will, our kingdoms or queendoms; and thus we must make decisions…

It is entirely up to us whether we are collaborators with God, working for the good, or competitors against God, establishing ourselves as rulers of our little universes…The goal is to align our own little queendoms and kingdoms with the great kingdom, the range of God’s effective will, so that we can say continually, ‘Not my will, but thine be done.’

We see that the decisions we make – what we eat, what we drink, what we wear, where we live, who we spend time with (in other words, all the things we do within our kingdoms and queendoms) – have an impact not only on our own lives but on the lives of those around us…Our kingdoms will either be rooted in the values we discover in God’s kingdom – equity, justice, compassion, patience, love, and more – or they will not…

By creating space for reflection, evaluation, planning, and personal lifestyle change, the practice of Christian simplicity teaches us to recognize and reject the value systems of the world and replace them with the value systems of God’s kingdom.  Additionally, simplicity creates for us space, time, energy, and resources so that we might reorder our lives to intentionally pursue God’s kingdom in all of our daily living.  A thousand decisions a day, ten thousand decisions a week, millions of decisions in a lifetime – the summation of the impact of our earthly kingdoms on ourselves and our world…

Whatever individual steps we take, the goal is that our priorities will increasingly shift from meeting our own needs to addressing the  needs of others.”

-Richard Foster

Sometimes the only way to say what I want to say is by quoting someone else 🙂

“What I am trying to express is that these people {in Acts 2} were being taken over by the life of the Spirit, which transformed them at every point.  They were living on a new level of experience…The power of the Holy Spirit was felt and seen.  And in the context of that wonderful outpouring of God’s life, the sharing of resources was free and generous…To be quite honest about it, sharing is not difficult when the power of God is manifest in the midst of his people…

By now you may be wondering, ‘Why all this talk about miracles, divine power, and spiritual preparation?  Can’t we just get on with the business of simplifying our lifestyles without all the God-talk?’  I answer that you are welcome to try, and God help you – because you will sorely need it.  Although I deeply empathize with this ‘holy impatience’ to get on with the task, the clear witness of Scripture is that something beyond good intentions and willpower is needed to transform our egocentric, greed-captivated personalities into an all-inclusive community of loving, sharing persons…

Perhaps out of concern for the terrible inequities in the world, you have sought to open your heart and pocketbook to needy brothers and sisters.  Perhaps you’ve led the fight for certain causes of compassion in your church and community…But somehow, deep down inside, it all seems so dry and artificial…Could it be that we need to follow the lead of the disciples, who through bitter experience were taught that their first priority was to seek hard after the kingdom of God, and who found that once baptized into its life and power they were liberated to care for one another in unprecedented ways?”

Richard Foster

I had lots of questions and issues last post.  But one of the things that all this comes down to is, “Does it matter?  As an believer in Jesus, are these issues some that should even be worthy of my attention?”

We are learning through a training program at our church about how discipling great commission leaders is the prime charge Jesus gave His followers as the church.  If the main thrust of the church is preaching the Word, discipling and nurturing believers, and evangelizing the lost, what role does the church itself have in matters of justice for the poor & social reform?  If the local church isn’t called to do all things well, does that mean, therefore, it does not have a responsibility in those areas?  What about individuals who make up the local church?  Is individual effort enough?  Do corporate measures need to be taken?  How does all this not lead to legalism: the idea that we can somehow earn our salvation through good works?  And what about the movements of churches exhibiting a radical social witness but abandoning what many consider sound, orthodox doctrine in their efforts?  
And the one that I wrestle with daily: who am I?  Why should I be trying to tackle these issues?  What do I even know?  How much experience do I really have in wrestling through the intricacies of these ideas?  What does my internal world and personal, daily life say about these matters’ importance in my heart?
More questions than answers.  And in working through the Freedom of Simplicity book I also picked up another book recommended by a friend, Generous Justice, which addresses these issues from multiple angles.  I’ve found some of his answers to these questions quite helpful and wanted to include this book as I document this journey.
And really that’s all I have for today.  I’m not sure where to dive in with some of the things I’ve read and talked through with others.  I’ll figure it out.  For now just know that while this fascinates and excites me, I don’t know what I’m doing most of the time.  I just want to consolidate thoughts in one place and hopefully include you in the process.  
Off to have a Saturday!
  

More Simplicity

In thinking through money, possessions, inner detachment and the freedom of simplicity, this quote has come to mind more than once:

“Grace and latitude should mark our relationships.  All too often we can injure each other unduly in our zeal for justice and truth and righteousness.  The spirit of condemnation can creep into our relationships terribly subtly.  We can begin to look at each other’s possessions with a mental calculator.  But there is a more excellent way: we simply need to be with one another, loving, supporting, caring.  Of course, we live and speak the truth as it has been given to us, but the business of straightening each other out belongs to God, not us.”  (Foster, p. 193)

And one more:

“Let us seek to develop many corporate celebrations and feast days.  We are enriched by celebrating the goodness of God and our life together…We need times when our frugality gives way to the joyous slaying of the ‘fatted calf’…We all need festivals of joy as together we seek the holy simplicity so inherent in the kingdom of God.” (p. 194)

So in that spirit, one that is full of joy and freedom, I want to travel on with longer strides.

One way we can use outwardly simplified lifestyles is by allowing our pared-down needs to free us up to serve.  Foster talks about a carpenter who supports his family by working 2 days a week, while the rest of the week he and his family focus on justice for the poor in the city.  Or teachers who keep their needs low so they can use summers for ministry.  Where?  Anywhere there are people.  “Crisis centers, counseling services, hospitals, and a host of other agencies all need our help.  In one metropolitan city a small fellowship was able to find homes for some 350 homeless children.”
Our church takes small group life seriously, but also asks those groups to look outside themselves in service.  I’m sure most church leaders know of lots of opportunities to help lend a hand if they are asked.
Of course the best way to know where to serve and how is to be in people’s lives.  And that’s where it gets sticky.  That is a whole ‘nother story.  A messy one.  I’m sure you know that.  It’s called friendship.  And when it’s with the vulnerable of society, Foster calls this “identification with the poor.”  Finding out who in our cities are truly forgotten, abandoned and defenseless.  Bringing their needs to the attention of officials and pleading their cause before the powerful.
Another way is to live among those vulnerable or needy.  Think Mother Teresa in India.  Or you right where you are.  “Many of us, however, will be called to be among the abandoned of the earth in less dramatic ways.  We will respond to divine promptings to visit prisons and hospitals, rest homes and mental institutions.  We will tutor little ones deprived of basic skills.  We will take time to play with the child down the street that sits on the curb alone.”
Just as I typed that I thought of all the people I know who are doing that.  There are probably way more than I know simply because humility doesn’t demand attention.  I’m so grateful to know so many who love God and love others well.
And for the one that kills me.  The quote I think of often, knowing there needs to be a balance between sheltering and showing in parenting:
“Our children need to join us in this ministry of identification.  We do them no favor by shielding them from suffering and need.  If we imprison them in ghettos of affluence, how can they learn compassion for the broken of the world?  So let us walk hand in hand with our children into pockets of misery and suffering.
One specific means of identification with the poor is discovered in our approach to education.  Do we see a college education, for example, as a ticket to privilege or as a training for service to the needy?  What do we teach our teenagers in this matter?  Do we urge them to enter college because it will better equip them to serve? Or do we try to bribe them with promises of future status and salary increases?  No wonder they graduate more deeply concerned about their standard of living than about suffering humanity.”
Obviously, wisdom is needed in filtering those quotes.  But there they are.
Parenting constantly presents me with opportunities to choose “safe” over “obedient” in situations.  One of my main roles as parent is protecting my children.  One of my main roles as Child of God is obedience to Jesus, even when it is inconvenient or intimidating.
For example.  There are lots of things Caden is picking up from hanging out with neighborhood kids or from school.  (And so that I don’t come across as naive or arrogant, my child has introduced others to a few things himself.)  As we’ve started this journey through schooling, I see why homeschooling, private schooling, and transfering to more prestigious schools are so desirable.  I’m not saying we won’t do any or all of those things.  Our plan is to take it one year at a time one child at a time.  (Obviously there’s no other way to do it, I’m just saying I haven’t landed on some dramatic ‘stance’ toward schooling.)
And yet.
There’s something in me that wonders.  We are well-educated people from good families with good jobs.  If every person with that background moves to certain neighborhoods, or takes their kids to certain schools, what will become of the rest of them?  If the school down the street has low parent involvement and low finances (since the tax values of homes nearby are lower) couldn’t that mean throwing in in this neighborhood would be good?  And if not, how else do things change?

This topic is especially close to home as we regularly talk seriously about buying our first home.  We don’t have all noble ideals in talking through where to live or what kind of house to buy.  Foster touches on this in regards to real estate.  “In a system where funding for schools, public infrastructure, and other governmental services is determined by local-area tax base, those who find themselves poor receive inferior services and have fewer employment, social, and recreational opportunities than the wealthy…Those with abundant money to spend can live where they like and often end up as neighbors, while those with lesser means live in less affluent neighborhoods.  The aggregate of these individual decisions segregates the poor from the rich.”  (p. 201)

Foster makes sure to point out he owns a home.  We plan to make sure the home we invest in one day is a good one.  This is not about buying or not buying houses or feeling guilty.  For me at least, it’s about a level of awareness we tend to go through life without.
If there is a division in our world between rich and poor, haves and have-nots, why?  And if the Bible has much to say about what His children’s heart attitude toward the poor should be, why doesn’t mine line up with that?  And if there are real problems within the structure of our society, whose problem is it?
I’m not typing all this out just to feel good about it.  These are real questions I have and real topics I struggle with and real conversations I have with people.  Through reading and praying and thinking I have come to a few conclusions.  I plan on continuing to document that journey.
For today, I’ll end with saying I know there are both individual and corporate measures to be taken.  Since I am one person writing to other one persons, I’ll quote Foster on some steps we one persons can take:
“We can recycle.  We can reuse.  We can decide not to buy in the first place.
We can bike.  We can walk.  We can choose to stay at home and get to know our neighbors.
We can write.  We can sing.  We can decide to entertain ourselves and our friends.  
Taking the values we find in Christian simplicity and implementing them in our own lives is the primary way we can encourage these values in the world in which we find ourselves: our homes, our neighborhoods, our cities, our nations.”  (p. 210)

More next time!

Spiritual Eyesight

Then he sent horses and chariots and a strong force there.  They went by night and surrounded the city.

When the servant of the man of God got up and went out early the next morning, an army of horses and chariots had surrounded the city.

“Oh my lord, what shall we do?” the servant asked.

“Don’t be afraid, ” the prophet answered.  “Those who are with us are more than those who are with them.

And Elisha prayed, “O LORD, open his eyes so he may see.”  Then the LORD opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.”  2 Kings 6:14-17

From my study today.  I was having a day where my eyes needed to be opened and I didn’t even know it.

“Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”  Hebrews 11:1

More

Our group has been digging in at the nursing home.  I’ve been surprisingly reluctant to document it here.  I’ve been holding some things pretty close to my heart.  We have a couple of ladies who are open to us and letting us in their lives.  It is not pretty or perfect, but it is real.  I’m grateful to join many other people, churches, and groups in reaching out to those who are shut in.

It’s got me thinking about simplicity more.  And making my life count.  We aren’t guaranteed tomorrow.  Therefore, making today count is important.

Last time I wrote about simplicity of heart, I hinted that Foster had ideas – once the internal nature of simplicity is firmly rooted in our thinking and lives – for going deeper in outward simplicity.  I thought I’d document some here, as a way of encouragement and keeping the ideas in front of me.

The first area that might be quite obvious was to talk through a need for planned spending.  A budget.  He reminds readers that “Forty years of gainful employment times and annual income of $30,000 would amount to $1.2 million for which we are responsible.  And that doesn’t include any increase in salary.  How dare we even think of handling such a tremendous resource without careful records.” (p.141)

I know.  He doesn’t mince words.  But put that way, it is compelling.  We were talking with friends about how long it takes to find a budget that works and is practical.  Then how hard it is to keep that budget.  It’s taken a long time in our marriage, and good advice from wise people, but we’ve found a system that is working right now.  My favorite point of Foster’s is to “put the giving of money to Christ and His Kingdom in a different financial frame of mind from other budget items.  What I mean is this: most budget items we hope to hold down, but our desire is to see giving increase as much as possible.”

Don’t you love that perspective?  Yes, that releases resources to meet needs.  But just as important, it keeps our hearts from greed.  It constantly challenges our motives in earning.  Others are blessed, but we are saved from ourselves.

A fun challenge he suggested was when you find you have a need for something, to ask God to bring it without automatically going out to buy it.  It could be a light-hearted exercise, watching God provide for needs.  It is very, very easy for Him to provide for our material needs.  He urges us to lay down the crushing burden of trying to get ahead and provide for ourselves.  (Matt 6)  Of course, we know this doesn’t mean we don’t work.  “No, we work, but we work in faith, not in the anxious concern of distrust.  We make provision as it seems right and good (just as the birds do), but what comes to us is not so much the result of our labor as it is the gracious gift of God.”

We have seen over and over God provide for our needs.  I’m sure you have, too.  I go through periods where I forget to take notice, but when I do notice…man, am I overwhelmed.

And the fun part is we get to be used by Him to help provide for others’ needs.  And the earth will appreciate any efforts of simplicity of life.  “Our little planet simply cannot sustain the gluttonous consumption of the wealthy West…If the rest of the world were to attempt to live on our level of consumption, it is projected that all known world resources of petroleum, tin, zinc, natural gas, lead, copper, tungsten, gold, and mercury would be exhausted in ten years…our planet simply cannot support the overload were the starving masses raised to our level of consumption.”

What does that do to your heart?  Part of my heart shrinks back.  I don’t know what to do with that quote while looking at my electric-powered washing machine, gas-powered car, and air conditioned home.  Do you know?  I don’t know.  I know God has put us smack in the middle of wealthy America in the 21st century and that the life we need to live in this culture is helped by these conveniences.  And that being motivated by guilt never produces good fruit.  I also have learned through experience there’s a way to not take these things for granted or be addicted to conveniences & comfort in general.  I wonder if learning to hold things with an open hand can be a journey with God that varies greatly between individuals and families.

What I know for sure is we can’t do this alone.  We can’t do much of the life in Christ alone.  Or we aren’t supposed to.  He made us to be in community, and we can help each other figure out what it looks like to go deeper or when we’re moving toward greed.  Yes, it’s a personal topic.  But I so hope we have people who can see into our lives.  All the way in.  I’m so grateful to be part of a church that takes small group community seriously.

This is a lot of words.  And I didn’t even get to lots of his thought-provoking suggestions.  I’m going to try to take smaller chunks and write more often.  What it does to my own heart when I put things down in (mostly) my own words is hard to explain.  Just know it helps me to do this.  I hope it encourages you, too.

New Verses

Some verses from our group’s study that have been speaking to me lately:

Psalm 25:4-5 “Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.”
2 Corinthians 1:20a “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are ‘Yes’ in Christ.”
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”
1 Kings 18:42 “So Ahab went off to eat and drink, but Elijah climbed to the top of Carmel, bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees.”
Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their evil ways, when they carry out their evil schemes.”
Micah 7:7 “But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.”
John 16:7 “I tell you the truth: It is for your good that I am going away.  Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.”
Psalm 25:12 “Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD?  He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.”

No More Sad

So about that heavy heart thing…I’m doing good.  The past two days he’s run into the school when the door opens going, “Bye Mom!”  He loves it.  He loves his teacher, he loves when he gets “homework,” he loves Jacob and Carter.  Just love.

The first day Caleb napped and I got out Caden’s baby book after a leisurely reading time.  Mind you, I didn’t actually scrapbook anything, but it was out in case!  I got distracted by pictures and wandered down memory lane.

Yesterday Caleb had already napped earlier so I went grocery shopping with just one child!  Plus, we rocked a long time and I savored some me-and-Caleb moments.

Today I’m thinking Sonic Happy Hour is in order.  It’s a rough life.

But seriously, my hair is done.  My kitchen is clean.  Dinner is prepped.  Laundry is laundering.  Life is good.

And the best part?  Caden falls in bed exhausted at the end of the day – around 7:30!!  We were in that weird transition stage of kinda still need a nap, but not every day.  And when he took too long a nap we paid for it that night.  But these days sleeping is off the charts!  Not only is he not napping, but he’s engaged and active during that time.  We were needing a tired and ready for bed boy.  And boy do we have one now!  (Am I the only one whose sanity seems to rely heavily on sleep?)

Just thought I’d share.  I’m sure it won’t all be roses and butterflies, but we’re having a nice time so far!

First Day

I just dropped my first born off at PreK.  He was all about it then changed his tune a minute or two into entering the room.  Even though he seemed to get over it quickly, I prayed Jesus would help him have a good first day and love school.

It sprinkled as I walked back home across the school yard, baby in the stroller.  Though I didn’t cry, my heart felt heavy.  I know he’s just across the street, but that’s a lot further away than he has been the last four years.

God of the universe, please help one little boy make friends, quickly learn rules, and whet his appetite to learn for the rest of his life.

My man just called to check on me.  He’s wonderful.

Some pictures to remember this day:

With Daddy

I entitled the next series of pictures “Trying to get a second decent pose”

Showing off the backpack

Such a big kid

With Mama

This will be all right

Here’s to the next 14 years!