The night before our wedding, after hanging out with friends who live in Hawaii and friends from high school and family and friends from college, my man goes, “I hope in heaven, we get to have a house next to all these guys.” (Yes, I got a good one.)
This morning we moved out our friends. We’ve (literally) been all over the world the last four years. They’ve been our one constant. Aside from our One Constant. We’ve seen each other through the ugliest character issues surfacing through culture shock (if you’re reading this, guys, I’m talking about my issues 😉 ), our first born boys, postpartum (the women had some moments afterwards too), living in an apartment together for 6 weeks in a foreign country with one wife on bedrest and the other one with a screaming, colicky infant (and we still like each other!), visa dramas, “church” – just the four of us with an iPod-, friends’ deaths, family’s surgeries, family’s deaths, family’s transplants, families driving us crazy, driving each other crazy, figuring out how to be parents and, well, you get the idea.
Yes, I’ve cried a lot the last few weeks. And been homesick for the area they get to return to. But mostly I’m just excited for them. That’s from Him. I don’t care about other people that much on my own. I’m not that nice.
But it is hard. What a void. Caden’s best buddy, hands down. Other friends don’t even come close.
*Sigh.* No, this isn’t heaven. But it’s coming. And until then, we are here for a reason. And most of that has to do with joining Him in making sure other people are in heaven, too. Worth it.
Still, this is the quote in my heart right this moment:
“Intimacy with God grows through sharing every realm of experience. I’ve wept bitterly with Him. I’ve screamed in frustration. Sometimes I thought He was going to break my heart in two. But I’ve also laughed out loud with Him. Wept with unspeakable joy. Left the chair and gone to my knees in awe. Squealed with excitement.
I have been to every extremity and back with God. But if I had to define my relationship with Him by one general statement, I would tell you that He is the absolute joy of my life. I don’t just love Him. I love loving Him. Surrendering my heart to Him has not been a sacrifice. I don’t know any other way to say it: He works for me.
I am hesitant to say all of this because I would be sickened to think I might sound proud of my relationship with God. Please hear my heart when I tell you that the greatest joy in my life is the very thing I have deserved least. I consider the ability to love Him and enjoy Him an absolute gift of grace…one He will gladly extend to anyone who offers Him her whole heart.”
– Breaking Free
We will pray for you all the time, guys. Write us all the funny stuff. And remember to shove food down their throats.